Cyanide

I want to say I'm happy,
But I'm not.
Honestly I'm terrified
And these half-truths you're feeding me
Leave me floundering, drowning.
We promise ourselves one thing
Then give ourselves another.
No one stops for a break because
We're already broken.
You convinced me we should strive
For it, told me we could survive
On hatred and greed;
That nagging hunger we've got to feed.
My head's buzzing,
Drums are pounding,
Funeral march is our new procession
Clinging to that all-important want: possession.
We don't own it, it owns us
Crumbling foundations, skeletons rust
In our machine bodies, but nobody cares
We are all so utterly unprepared
For what must come, the inevitable.
The end.

~
Cyanide by Audrey H. (c)2009

I feel angsty today.

Eeeeeee! EEEEE!!!!

I love My Chemical Romaaaaance you guyssssss.

Listen to their cover of All I Want for Christmas is You.

I wanna eat Gerard's face. He's so adorable!!!!! 8D

Also though, they're just so GOOD. Oh my god. I can't stop listening to them. They're so so so so GOOD.

I freaking love music.

All my followers get giant cookies.

Yay! Hugs! I'm so proud of you guys for being awesome! Everyone knows that by being awesome you have decreased suck levels by 13% each!!!

In other [unrelated] news, I am reading Outside Beauty by Cynthia Kadohata. I met Cynthia back in Arizona and have a hardback copy of "Weedflower" [which, coincidentally, I won] and it is signed by her! I love her books. Outside Beauty is a brilliant book so far, so intriguing and fun.

I finished Suite Scarlett by Maureen Johnson and it was one of the best books I've read in a long time. [lie; pretty much every book I've read since I started my book log has been amazing.] Spencer was my favorite character, I want to marry him.

Speaking of attraction...

I have discovered my... I don't know, the feature in the opposite sex that I find truly sexy.

You ready for this?
Arms.

Yes. Arms.

I just look at Taylor Lautner's arms in the New Moon Poster and I just want to pet them. They're so... GRAWR. Yummy!!!

And Gerard's arms... amazing. [Gerard Way, lead singer of My Chemical Romance, for the ignorant among you.] I have a picture of him on my Zune that, when I look at it, I don't stare at his face.
I stare at his sexyfine arms.

I realize this revelation may lose me some followers.... I AM NOT THAT CREEPY NORMALLY.

*ahem*

Anyway, I've been packing up my room since we move into our new house on FRIDAY!!!

I'm very excited. I'm going to have a Harry Potter/wizarding supplies shelf above my bed. I could pee joy. Harry Potter is my lover.

Also, listen to the acoustic version of Diary of Jane by Breaking Benjamin. It's gorgeous. And listen to 21 Guns by Green Day. It's off their new album and it's AMAZING. I could eat it for breakfast. It's lovely.

Anyway, have a good night/day/evening/midmorning snack/happy dance!

~Audrey

Yeah, I'm good

So I was writing a scene in my story just now and had to share a piece of my writing:

Something inside him was breaking. It had to be his heart; he was certain that his literal, beating heart was very literally beginning to crack down the middle and shatter into a bloody mess inside of his chest.

YEAH. I think I really like that a lot. The scene is SO sad and kind of gory too, but you know how much I love delicious gore. *grins*

Also, any readers of my blog, could you push the "follow" button? Because my self esteem needs a boost every now and then and having subscribers makes that boost happen.

Have a good night/day/afternoon/sandwich!

Oh, sadness

I packed up my books yesterday for the move.
It made me sad.
I know we move into the house next week.
But I had to give all my Harry Potter books a hug before I put them in the box.

Nerdy? Oui.
Does anyone else feel this way about their books?

Yes yes yes precious

So this week I have been...

...laughing because: so many things!!!! The best was probably while talking to the brilliant folks from the Telling Room!!!!!

...depressed because: there is not a reason at all for me to be depressed.

...freaking out because: I HAD THE BEST NIGHT EVER.

...reading: Suite Scarlett by Maureen Johnson. Quite possibly the best book ever.

...listening to: Amy Winehouse

...writing: some bits of my story. It's taken a new turn and I'm loving it!
...happy because: THIS NIGHT. THIS NIGHT.

This week's photos:

Yes I am signing a book!!!! :D

Emilia Dahlin!!!!

AMAZING NIGHT!!!

TONIGHT was amazing!!!!! It was the Telling Room's release of their new anthology, "Tearing Down the Playground" which has a story of mine in it and my photograph is the COVER!!!!! I also sang the song I wrote in their Songwriting class with Emilia Dahlin!!!!!!!!!

I sang in front of soooo many people and they were clapping to the beat and I was glowing I was so happy!

THEN tons of people were coming up to me, exclaiming how good I was and how much I rocked!!!! THEN a woman had me sign the anthology and I got to see Alena (a super nice girl from photography class who wrote a fantastic poem) which rocked because I got her email so we can keep in touch!!!!

AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF we officially closed on the house today!!!!!

THIS HAS BEEN THE BEST DAY EVER. I met a woman from the Portland Hive, the writer's program I'm doing this summer, and she ADORED the short story I sent in for my application. She was telling me how excited she was to have me in the class and I was SO SO SO happy.

I hope every one of you had a good day today. TELL ME something good that happened to you today!!!! Give me a comment and tell me one good thing that happened today for you.

I love you all so so so much.

~Audrey

Audrey, Wait! and music

Book Recommendation: Audrey, Wait! by Robin Benway

Review: The reason I picked up this book was because, yes, my name was glaring at me from the cover. Reading the back, I discovered an intriguing story: a 16-year-old girl, Audrey Cuttler, breaks up with her boyfriend, who is the singer of a local band (the Do-Gooders). That night at the band's "gig", Evan (Audrey's now ex-boyfriend) introduces a new song he's written: "Audrey, Wait!". Audrey is humiliated that her ex has written a song about their breakup, of course, but she forgets it after a few weeks. But then it turns out that the boys are now signed on a record deal because of The Song, and in next to no time, "Audrey, Wait!" is in the Top 100. Audrey's life is turned upside-down as she suddenly becomes super-famous, with her own fansites, paparrazzi stalking her like the Black Plague, reporters calling her house every five minutes, and freshmen girls at her high school staring at her like she's some kind of God.
Not to mention she's got a crush on her co-worker at the ice-cream shoppe.

It was a fantasitc, funny, and realistic insight to a music-loving teenage girl's life invaded by sudden unwanted fame. I found a great connection towards Audrey, and not just because we share the same name! I also connected with her love of rock music, concerts, posters, and turning up the volume. It was wel written, with the perfect mix of funny and sweet and sad. I found pulled into the story, and the characters seemed real. Audrey's hilarious narration will keep you turning pages for sure.

I'd suggest a 13+ rating on this book merely because of the swearing and some sexual references. Rating is five stars for sure.


As to music, I'm starting to like Fall Out Boy. Just thought I'd share. =]

Happy Mother's Day!!!!!!!! Love you, mom.

My Movie

A video I made for filmmaking class.

A Lit class has to write a report about Twelfth Night. The result is... interesting, to say the least.

HUGE thanks to my classmates and teachers, and my dad for letting me use his music.

OH MY GOD!

http://www.tellingroom.org/stories/stories_anthologies.html

http://www.tellingroom.org/index.html

The anthology by the Telling Room, "Tearing Down the Playground" is going to feature AS THE FIRST STORY NO LESS my short story I wrote in the Telling Room photojournalism class. The story is "The Fence" and is accompanied by a photograph I took.

AND. THE COVER OF THE BOOK. GUESS WHOSE PHOTO THAT IS?

MINE. I TOOK THAT.

I am SO honored and excited and thrilled and ECSTATIC.

NOT TO MENTION. In the Songwriting class I took (also a Telling Room class) I wrote a song called Memory Lane, (music was written by Emilia Dahlin, http://www.myspace.com/emiliadahlinmusic one of my teachers). and during the opening for the book on Wednesday I AM GOING TO PERFORM MY SONG WITH EMILIA. ON STAGE.

I am SO happy. This is like a dream come true. I am so so so grateful to have this opportunity.

AND OH MY GOD MY PHOTOGRAPHY IS BEING USED AS A BOOK COVER AND OH MY GOD MY STORY IS IN A BOOK.

ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom ThankyouTellingRoom

So it's been a while

Hey all!
I've been busy busy busy.

Actually, that's a lie. I just forget about this thing sometimes.

I'm actually a bit ticked off at the moment. This girl borrowed a book of mine and finally is getting it back to me but it now has no cover and the binding is ripped. I gotta admit, I'm seriously irritated.

Anyway, how are YOU?

Blaaaaaaah

I'm in a bad mood for no particular reason. Butt face. (not you. just.... fah. never mind.)

Anyway, hi. Like my new banner? I do. XD

Katy Perry is growing on me.

I hate I Kissed a Girl. I do.

But Hot n Cold is catchy and fun to dance to.

and oh my god. Thinking of You is supreme.

I don't know what to make of myself. Katy Perry??!!

But no. I refuse to be one of "those" people. Who disses music because of people who listen to it. Emo cutters listen to MCR. Does that mean I'm going to cut myself? NO. and those emos are weird. Because MCR is anti-emo and anti-suicide.

But I digress.